Resonations

Torn between joy, freedom, and guilt at leaving my then three-year-old daughter behind, I went to Europe to complete a part of my study programme in International Business in May 2015. My friends know what a conflicting time it was for me, given I had to miss moments such as my daughter's first day at school. I was judged aplenty by anybody and everybody. I was discouraged by many from going to Europe, just like I was discouraged from pursuing a steady career, afterwards.  I persisted.  Thankfully, my parents, my sister and my little daughter stood by me. I continued to work from home for two years, after birthing my son in 2017, until I was pushed to quit work for assorted reasons.  Trust me, I fought till the last.  I freelanced and consulted. I slogged it out for peanuts, only to run into an enormous blank wall, from time to time. I know that I am not alone in this journey.  I would like to share a friend's true story here. This was a girl who always wanted to be a doctor. S

20 years of Alaipayuthey, it is! When Alaipayuthey came out in 2000, some well-wishers had made it apparent to my parents that I was not to watch the movie at all. "Such a bad influence, they say," I was told. Curious and rebellious as I was, it was all I needed to want to watch the movie. When I went back to school later in June, there were animated discussions about the movie and the charming, dashing Madhavan (of course!) I'd be looked at like I'd missed so much in life! There was so much 'Alaipayuthey' in the air that I fell in love with the movie even before I'd watched it. By the time I watched the movie in Theni with my cousins, it was past October - those were times when you could catch a good movie months after its release, in a legit theatre. I was so, so smitten by the movie, the music, and the leads. The hype my friends had added to it only helped elevate the movie to give me such a high. Like the coming together of Potterheads, b

Image sourced from https://bit.ly/2Te0uWu You've been to this place where the eye cannot see Convinced that you'd been robbed of all light that ever was you'd crept within and waited for the moment you'd be seen - so you may live and breathe and dance and find meaning, again. You screwed your eyes shut your eyelids latched in fear praying for deliverance, pledging kindness in return. Then comes the world (or your perception), crumbling, unleashing fireballs stilling you in the swirls ripping your cocoon, leaving nowhere to crouch or hide But just like love that blooms around the ways and times of an ugly war you sense your hope growing deep and tall in similes of grace embracing all.  You fall out of a massive sky inky and starred and vast and wide as the universe plays her songs of yore just as old as the burning stars reminding you to breathe, reminding you to hope,  leading you to drift in peace,  to give in to its calm. As you give in, overwhelmed come those shards